In class Tuesday we talked about the abuse, both physical and emotional that took place in the novel, Their Eyes Were Watching God. We started to touch on the subject of why didn’t she just leave or how could she put up with what was happening to her. Abuse no matter what the form physical or emotional and not matter the time in history past or present it doesn’t change it is all the same and it all hurts. But what people don’t realize is that the women in these relationships most of the time are completely in love with their abuser and don’t what to leave because it’s not always like this. That is a line that echoes through time but most of the time that is true, most men that are abusers are great to be around and you can have some of the best times in your life with these men, until something triggers that anger and they do a complete one eighty.
I’ve speaking from personal experience. But it also takes a strong woman to be able to decide whether to stay if they are emotionally strong enough to handle the situation or if they should leave. Because really if you have ever been in an abusive relationship you may agree with me and you may not, I always say the abuse that hurts the most and leaves the deepest scar is the emotional abuse, the physical stuff the cuts and bruises that will heal the emotional stuff that stays with you. The physical stuff I could handle I was a Marine I could fight back and stand my ground hold my own with my abuser the emotional stuff that takes a little longer for me to deal with because I am not one to show my emotions or to let people in.
So I guess what I am trying to say is that when it comes to abusive relationships they are all different and there are reasons that women stay with their abuser and it is not because they are dumb or stupid sometimes its love and love is a powerful thing. But sometimes in the worst cases of abuse the women can’t leave or the fear is too great for them to take the chance to leave because he will try to kill her or her children. So when it comes to abusive relationships each one is different and the people are different. I’m not saying that abusive relationships are ok I’m not saying that at all I can honestly say that I HATE men that abuse women and I wish that the women in these relationships realized that there is help out there for them.
I think back in that day and age (of TEWWG) domestic abuse was so much more accepted. I think that made it ten times harder for a woman in an abusive relationship to leave. It seems a hard enough decision but to not even have anyone to back you up would make it much more difficult. I also think the men back then had only the same kind of man to look up to. Nowadays abuse is still prevalent, unfortunately, but it is not accepted in society. At least when and if a woman gets up the courage to leave her abuser in our society, she'll have some help on the outside.
ReplyDeleteI applaud you for your strength to fight back and leave. I watched my mom being abused as a child. the fear of leaving for being killed is very real. I remember that my grandma had a loaded shotgun behind the front door( i was 6). When my mom did leave we left state and she had a loaded gun in the closet. The fear was so strong and real that my mom and grandma thought it was important to actually know where these weapons were. Scary stuff. I still deal with the emotional after effects 25 years later.
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